Mr. Big Shot

I was on the couch daydreaming while Mila pumped my Kunis during her red-carpet interview with Seacrest, and it dawned on me that your Knicks were slated to lose to the Heat tonight.  They were heading in as a 9.5 to 10 point underdogs across the board.  So to have these new Knicks emerge victorious, would be a bigger upset than Kirk Douglas’ somehow summoning the Spartacus deep within and fighting off the grim-reaper…just to get through his Oscar presentation.  I think he was born sometime during the last Knick-relevant era, and he’ll probably bite the dust during the next.  (Yeah, I said it, the Knicks are relevant.  In case some of you let that word take the runaway train away from your vocabulary, you can find it here.)

The fourth quarter was commencing in Miami and I caught a glance of the score; 66-65 Heat lead.  I bailed on my sister’s Oscar party (Kunis moments were complete) in the living room and’d the fourth quarter. (1)  I wasn’t planning on writing about this, but an old friend pulled out the ol’ bag of inspiration and punched me in the face with it.  Mr Big Shot strikes again.

Chauncey Billups hasn’t been getting the ink Carmelo has (and with good reason) but this dude has rendered your Knicks relevant right now!  Jamie and Max have and will continue to exhaust every angle of this franchise revamping deal, and as the representative from Detroit, I thought it fitting that I be the one to introduce you to Chauncey Alex billups.  I spent many many nights preaching to all within earshot that Chauncey was 75% of the reason my Pistons reached the Eastern Conference Finals in the aughts one time for each hooker in Charlie Sheen’s hotel room.(2)

The NFL is a quarterback league, one can argue MLB is a pitchers league, nobody cares about the NHL, and the NBA (as it hops in the DeLorean and scrolls the ticker to 1985) is slowly becoming a Point-Guard driven league.  serviceable 2’s and 3’s are seemingly a dime a dozen, big-men aren’t as big anymore, and a great floor general can elevate an entire supporting cast.  Chauncey is by no stretch a top 5 point-guard any longer (2), but what he brings to the table is exactly what I think this talent-transition needs.  No better time for me to educate you all on my man Chauncey then after yet another phenomenal fourth quarter performance.

Its been said before on this very blog, but Chauncey is one of the savviest veterans in the league.  His hulk-like strength in a small package working in conjunction with his impeccable on-court decision-making, render him the perfect driver for what will inevitably be a sloppy road to consistency.  This team runs, and in this running “system” these players do and will continue to fire up terrible rushed field goal attempts.  For one, Chauncey is an absolute monster with the pull-up three’s, but his ability to pull-back and let the offense set-up may be his greatest contribution.  There is going to be some time before this team learns to play with each other and obtains the ability to run a fluid offense.  Chauncey will be the greatest aid in speeding this process up.  He’s an expediter. These skills are no doubt utilized throughout the game but they reach an unparalleled level of recognizability in the clutch.

Billups may not be that top 5 I referred to, but when its clutch time…there is still none better.  His ability to push his brick-house self into the paint and draw these fouls are ever-so key in the waning minutes of the game.  And in those waning moments, when the free throws will make or break you…they never break Chauncey.  The last time I saw Chauncey miss a clutch free throw, Charlie Sheen was an Estevez. (2)  This man thrives on big situations in big moments.  His two steals from Wade late in the game exemplify my point.  He may have lost some of his defensive skill-set physically, but he makes up for this with his brilliance.  That 360 drop pass to the trailer after that second steal was a flawless move very few have the presence of mind to execute.  There aren’t many in the league whose hands I’d want the ball in as the clock moves closer to zeros.

All this, and he’s a great “clubhouse” guy.  He’s a leader, a quintessential floor-general, and an absolute great dude off the court.  New York acquired one helluva baller and an even cooler dude.  You’re all gonna love rooting for this guy…we still do.

(1) My sister is one of my two roommates, alright?. I don’t live in my mother’s basement…(although I’m considering moving back there unless this blog starts paying me.)  She also comes with many 20-something females chillaxin’ on my couch on a regular basis. I win…
(2) proof, proof, and more proof that I read my blog-partner’s posts
(3) My top 5, in this order…Rose, Paul (very scared of his knee tho), Westbrook, Williams, Rondo (with the Honorable Mention to Nash) Tho Westbrook may be my favorite….

a little PS of observations
-the knicks take terrible early shot clock jackups
-you don’t have jump-shooters that can hit the contested three….stop taking them
-Dennis Rodman could probably sign a 10 day contract, and lead your team in rebounds
-Miami had more second chances than Charlie Sheens career (2).
-was it ironic that this game was essentially won on the defensive end? Wade was as close to shut down as he’ll ever be, and Amare’s game-winning block from across the paint was VERY un-Knick like…nice win
-i now have all the damn NY teams to follow….thank GOD for (formerly

-by Lowell Ahee II



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3 responses to “Mr. Big Shot

  1. Tony Spencer

    Wow no one cares about the NHL? No one cares about you or Chauncey.

  2. Chris

    You are such a good writer.

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